Cars 2

Disclaimer: "Cars 2" was unfortunately made completely for the money.  I used to think Pixar didn't do that sort of thing.  But, who could pass on all those merchandise sales, from a sequel!

"Cars 2" was co-directed by John Lasseter and Brad Lewis.  It stars Michael Caine, Larry the Cable Guy, Owen Wilson, Emily Mortimer, Eddie Izzard, John Ratzenberger, etc.

The plot involves Lightning McQueen (Owen Wilson), who has now won four Piston Cups, so now the natural next step in the life of a race car is to schlep around the world for the Grand Prix.  In case people want to know who the fastest car in the world is.  McQueen's best pal Mater (Larry the Cable Guy) comes along for the ride and slightly embarrasses his friend.  He makes up for this by being mistaken for a spy.  These are of course British spies, headed up by Finn McMissile (Michael Caine).  Something about oil and wanting to kill McQueen for some reason.  After almost two hours I honestly am not completely confident I know why they are spies.

Who knew that I would one day see a movie where Larry the Cable Guy would get top billing over someone as talented and wonderful as Michael Caine?  It seems a little weird.  Luckily, Michael Caine gets by far the most lines in this movie (as opposed to coming into work for 20 minutes for his "Inception" role and then running out of the studio with a large paycheck).  Anyway, he was my favorite part of this movie.  I find his voice irresistible.  And the British can get away with saying anything and making it sound intelligent, but that's just a rumor I've heard.

Besides Michael Caine, the next best thing this movie has to offer is stunningly beautiful animation.  It's incredible.  It is mostly vibrant and colorful like the last one, and most of Pixar's other movies.  Some scenes, including the opening, were much darker, which I assume is because they randomly decided the sequel would have a completely different feel and would belong in a different genre, than the first.  But, whatever, the animation was still up to par.  The views of downtown London, Japan, and the Italian countryside are wonderfully designed.  It amazes me and the big screen made it even better so you could soak in all the beauty.

The music in this is also wonderful.  That may be because it was done by Michael Giacchino, who did the beautiful soundtrack in "Up."  This time around in place of a emotional, sentimental sounding score we have one that adds to the thrilling, adventurous, spy-tastic movie that is "Cars 2."

Alright, some negative things.  It was a little long.  I don't understand why Pixar made their two weakest movies the longest.  It's a little weird, but I didn't get bored, probably because I knew Michael Caine's voice was going to be blasting through the speakers soon.

Another negative thing.  Some cheesy jokes, that I assume were meant for the people in the audience who have Cars onesies pajamas and other paraphernalia, but I will complain anyway.  Larry the Cable Guy looked at the script and it included a joke about how wasabi sounds like "What's Up?"  And he had the gall not to complain about it!  At another point he is referred to as "the bomb" by McQueen.  I know they are best friends, but come on Pixar scriptwriters!  There are some more that I can't remember off the top of my head, but you get the idea.  I guess after they decided to make this a spy movie, for literally no noticeable reason, they didn't really think deeply about specific lines.

Also, it didn't have the heart and emotional component like such Pixar modern classics like "Toy Story" (any of them), "Up", "Finding Nemo," etc.  They closest they came in this movie was mentioning how Doc Hudson had died.  It was extremely brief, but I appreciated the inclusion of this small scene, since Paul Newman passed away 3 years ago.  I was glad the role wasn't recast.

Unfortunately, Pixar no longer has a perfect track record for movies.  This is currently the only Pixar movie in 16 years to be called rotten on Rotten Tomatoes, with a low average of 34%.  I was skeptical at first, when I saw that this movie was being made, but decided to trust Pixar...and I liked the trailer.  All of this is not going to stop thousands of young people from flooding the theaters with their parents, grandparents, and legal guardians or babysitters.

Well this is getting long so I will try to sum up my feelings.  Did people really expect "Cars 2" to be an instant classic like some others from the studio?  Take at look at the title of this movie just once more.  Pixar just needed to be a little greedy and that is precisely why this movie exists.  Personally, I'm in favor of giving Michael Caine a paycheck.  He is an American treasure...well technically a British treasure.  This movie is definitely entertaining, but doesn't have the substance movie goers have grown used to.  It's visually stunning and full of high octane fun, mainly for youngsters.  It just makes very little sense and many things seemed random.  So basically, this is not Pixar's finest hour.  But, so what, they can make up for it with "Brave" and "Monster's University."  It must be stressful cranking out amazing movies all the time. And "Cars 2" is better than "Alvin and the Chipmunks," "Yogi Bear," "The Smurfs," and more Spy Kids and Shrek movies, etc....so stop whining.

Note: There is a "Toy Story" short, entitled "Hawaiian Vacation," before "Cars 2."  It is absolutely wonderful and may make people wish they were watching "Toy Story 3" again.  I both laughed and smiled during the brief 6 minutes.  Pixar promises no more "Toy Story" films, but I highly support these shorts, so we get to see more of these characters.  I vote Disney puts a "Toy Story" short before every release of theirs.

Another Note: "Wall-e", "Up," and "Toy Story 3" was Pixar Animations Studios spoiling Americans for  a few years.

2 1/2 stars out of 4

-Joseph Sbrilli

Cars: A Quick Review

This may go without saying, but I love Pixar movies.  True, I'm not a fan of "A Bug's Life" or "The Incredibles," but I plan on learning to love them.  I hear they are quite good.  Well anyway I watched "Cars" again recently, in preparation for "Cars 2."  While, it's not quite as good as some of their other hits like the "Toy Story" fims, "Finding Nemo," or "Up," it is still highly entertaining and way better than 90% of the crap that passes for family entertainment these days.  Family movies should be enjoyable for everyone, not make people with an IQ higher than 12 want to harm themselves during the movie.  Anyways, "Cars" in a nutshell is about a race car named Lightning McQueen, voiced by Owen Wilson. As I'm sure people close to me know, I find him incredible annoying.  In this movie for the most part he is tolerable, but every so often I wanted to scream because he is such an annoying actor with dumb hair. He is trying to win the Piston Cup, but obviously there's a three way tie and he has to travel to California for the tie breaking race. Naturally, he ends up in a mostly abandoned town out west.  After all, movies need conflict, otherwise it's a waste of time, money, and brainpower.  He's a jerk at first, and is quite the fish out of water, a popular plot device in millions of movies and television shows, but learns valuable lessons about friendship and other exciting things.  The cast, like all Pixar movies is phenomenal and includes the likes of Paul Newman, Bonnie Hunt, Larry the Cable Guy, John Ratzenberger, George Carlin, and several others.  Also, the animation is beautiful, with vibrant colors, and incredible "shots" of various vehicles driving across long stretches of highway, and nice shots of the west.  I'm hoping "Cars 2" is not the start of Pixar selling out...the reviews thus far are not promising.  I guess millions and millions of dollars off of toys alone was hard for anyone with a functioning brain to pass up, and a sequel was inevitable.

-Joseph Sbrilli

Restrepo: A Quick Review

I have now seen 3 out of the 5 documentaries nominated for an Academy Award this year. This is a personal achievement and probably beats out more than 90% of the American population. Just saying.

This may be the first time I have ever said this about a film, and it may be the very last time I say it: Restrepo is not long enough. two documentary filmmakers, Sebastian Junger and Tim Hetherington, spent an entire year filming the second platoon of battle company, 503rd infantry regiment in Afghanistan. If that wasn't dangerous enough, battle company is stationed in the Korengal Valley, one of the most hostile work environments on the planet. Quite a few insurgents live there and they don't like freedom. Through after battle interviews, real time firefights and in your face video the audience gets to follow the boys as they fight, kill and die in a war torn country. Restrepo refers to an outpost the soldiers built in the middle of insurgent activity and is an homage to their friend Juan "doc" Restrepo who was killed early on.

The filmmakers spend no time asking questions. We get an unadulterated account from the men themselves. Living as if there were no cameras involved at all. And we are privy to their private moments, the mental breakdown of a soldier after a leader gets shot down, and the adulation of  them watching a direct hit on some bad guys.

But Restrepo doesn't have enough. With just a 93 minute running time, I was left wanting. I wanted to know more of the soldiers. I wanted to know more about their mission, how it eventually turned out, what's the situation today. And I wanted more footage of Restrepo, a driving force behind many of the men's attitudes. It is still a great film but I needed more footage to satisfy my desire to spend more time with the boys.

3 out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

Side Note: You may have heard Tim Hetherington's name thrown around, he was killed documenting the growing conflict in Libya.

Megamind: A Quick Review

Q: Who can arch their eyebrow the highest?
A: Me

You know what's fun? Reviewing movies a year after they come out, right about the time everyone forgot they still existed except when they see them at the bottom of the bargain bin and they think, "Hmm, I wanted to see that" but they keep on walking because weirdos like me our scouring the bin for any sign of a decent film for five dollars. All I can say is thank God for Redbox.

Megamind (Will Ferrell) is an alien whose parents sent him to Earth before their planet gets sucked into a black hole. Metro Man's (Brad Pitt) parents had the same idea. Metro Man crash landed into a nice home while Megamind crashed into the state penitentiary  You can see how that might have caused some problems in his development (Just look at his douchey choice of facial hair). Metro Man becomes the hero while Megamind becomes the villain.

Megamind throws a little twist into the superhero mix by actually having the villain win. Megamind defeats Metro Man in a glorious explosion and subsequently tries to figure out what to do when he now controls the city. But what is a villains purpose without a hero? Are you really a villain anymore? Yes, but it's still depressing without a good challenge around.

Megamind, like Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs is a pleasant surprise. Not as funny, but just as endearing. I did laugh out loud at a few moments and the visuals really are top notch. Gloriously detailed explosions, buildings and buildings exploding. The voice cast as well, led deftly by Will Ferrell who somehow convinced me it wasn't Will Ferrell but the misunderstood Megamind, is just great. Really brings to life the picture.

A very enjoyable rent. Megamind doesn't break out of the mold too much but it's fun enough to sit through. Although they do create a pretty terrifying quasi-rapist-nerd-turnedsuperpowerful-villain in Jonah Hill's character. That got a little sketchy.

2 and a half out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

Your Highness: A Quick Review

How in the world do some movies get made? It's like Hollywood just puts movies out because otherwise they'd have nothing to do. And how did they get James Franco, Natalie Portman, and Zooey Deschanel into it? They must have photos of them in compromising positions, or they didn't read the script, or they thought it was a joke, or it was the easiest money they've ever made, or, and I'm serious on this one, this is the first sign of the apocalypse. If it's not it should be

Fabbeus (Danny McBride), or Theaddeus, I didn't really care to learn any ones name is a royal screwup. The other rhyming brother (James Franco) is the royal heir who likes to quest and make the other Gladius look bad. The good flabbeus finds a bride on his quest (Zooey) who promptly gets kidnapped by some evil wizard at their wedding that the bad crabbeus decided not attend because smoking weed is way more fun. King baddeus decides to send both brothers on a quest to rescue her, which is a problem for Danny McBride because questing sucks.

Your Highness is pretty bad all around. It plays like scary movie 5, or whatever other crap the Wayans are trying to push on me, the kind that make fun of at least 30 movies in one movie. The only shining star is Danny McBride because this is right up his alley. Hearing him drop f-bombs in front of medieval peasants was probably the whole inspiration for this film. And it's decent but it can't hold a whole film. I wouldn't watch this one for free, not that I'd recommend it but the only way to enjoy Your Highness is to go the Fabeus way and find something to smoke. That was probably the other inspiration: watching The Holy Grail whilst smoking....genius.

1/2 a star out of 4, and that's only because of Danny McBride

-Christopher O'Connell

Super 8

Every once in a while, Hollywood treats us to a movie that isn't a sequel, isn't a squeakquel, isn't based off a comic book and isn't an adaptation of an existing work. Sometimes they give us a movie that feels original, even if it isn't; a movie that screams "I am an homage to your childhood greats, and you will love me because I am unique enough to set them lovingly behind." Ladies and gentlemen, Super 8 is that film.

In the small town of Lillian, Ohio, five young boys and one young girl are filming a zombie movie for a local cinema contest. The boys are filming a departure scene when a train speeds past ("Production value!" the director screams). Joe Lamb (Joel Courtney) watches as a pickup truck meets the train head on, derailing it in a cacophony of explosions and near misses for the children. Joe watches a rail car mysteriously break open after coming to a stop. The kids hightail it out of there before the military shows up. Strange things begin happening in Lillian, dogs start running away, cars lose their engines, and people begin disappearing. When Alice Dainard (Elle Fanning) disappears, Joe gets the boys to help him find her and try to save the town.

J.J. Abrams has my attention. I would probably watch anything he produces, directs, writes after watching Super 8. He just makes things so interesting. I have to compare Super 8 with the other two films of his that I have seen Cloverfield and Star Trek.

Like Cloverfield, Super 8 contains a very disproportionate amount of no-name actors. The only actor I recognized played the evil Captain Nellic (Noah Emmerich), but J.J. has gathered some very impressive young ones. Joe Lamb is the title character, a boy who has just lost his mom and has no connection with his police officer dad Jackson Lamb (Kyle Chandler). Joe is friends with Cary, Preston, Charles, Martin; movie making buddies, the biggest of which (in size and attitude) being Charles, the director. All are fantastic with many hilarious lines that all sounded like they would come out of the mouth of a 12-year-old. Charles invites Alice played by Elle Fanning to join their zombie movies, which creates an awkward love triangle between Joe, Charles and her but I won't go into that. There's also a relationship between her dad and Joe's dad but I won't spoil that. Anyways, Elle is fantastic, wayyyy better than Dakota, who spends most of her time screaming in every film I remember seeing. Super 8 is the new Stand By Me for child actors. I expect great things from these kids in the future.

Like Star Trek, Super 8 has fantastic visual effects, and fantastic actors. I guess it's only like Cloverfield because you don't see the monster for most of the movie. The train crash is by far one of the most exciting things to be seen by my eyeballs. Add to that the extra bass that Regal Cinemas charged me three extra dollars for (thanks guys, you are the best) had me bouncing in my seat like an overjoyed toddler. Beautiful CGI mixed with actual explosions, the boy in me was satisfied. With just a $50 million dollar budget, Super 8 went above and beyond other more expensive films (I'm looking at you Battle: LA).

Super 8 may feature kids as the main characters, but it treads very close to an R-rating. The pacing of the film and the scant glances of the alien add to a sense of dread and horror throughout. Add some gore and you've got a film for adults, not kiddos. Even when you've seen the beast (the terrifying, pants wetting bus scene) it still is scary a scene later because you didn't get a good enough look.

Unfortunately, the alien resembles the Cloverfield monster a bit too much. It had a bit more human touch to it, but I looked around mouthing "Really? It's just a smaller one." Maybe Super 8 is a prequel.

Lies, Super 8 is way better, but it has an air of predictability. I called who was going to die in the first ten minutes. I called how it was going to end, very little of it surprised me. And they force fed the theme of the movie at the very end; I choked on that bit of cheesiness.

But boy, did it entertain me. Characters I truly cared about, actors and actresses impressing me at every level, visual effects that dazzled and the genius pairing of J.J and Stephen. There is a lot of Spielberg in Super 8 but there is enough J.J. to make it wholly his (including the lens flare deal from Star Trek). Super 8 is pretty super. An original (ish) idea that translates perfectly to the screen, I wouldn't miss this film for a thousand sequels.

3 and a 1/2 out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

All The President's Men

Disclaimer: This review is also super long because it was written for the same class.

All the President’s men couldn’t put Richard Nixon back together again. They actually made it worse by getting involved in one of the biggest cover ups in American history; a scandal that changed the average American’s perception on the presidency and its role in our lives. But All the President’s Men isn’t the story about the scandal, it is the story of the two talented journalists who stopped at nothing to uncover the truth and expose the lie of the century.


Bob Woodward (Robert Redford) is a young reporter working at The Washington Post. He is assigned to what seems to be an open and shut case: five men were found with bugging equipment inside the democratic national headquarters at Watergate Hotel. Woodward becomes suspicious when the defendants get a “country club attorney” working their case in the background. On further inspection Woodward finds that all five men have connections with the CIA.

Carl Bernstein (Dustin Hoffman), whose hair can only be described as “Greek god-like,” is a veteran reporter also working at The Post. He takes an interest in Woodward’s story and gets himself assigned to work with Woodward. The duo finds a trail that keeps leading deeper into the levels of the White House and the Committee to re-elect the President. Though their managing editor is initially reluctant to publish their findings, Woodward and Bernstein uncover enough evidence and sources to blow wide open a presidential crime.

All the President’s Men is a fantastic film. It has a running time of 138 minutes, in which nothing really exciting actually happens. There are no gunfights and no car chases but every new piece of evidence uncovered is as thrilling to the audience as it was to the men who found them. This can be attributed to the two wonderful leads. Dustin Hoffman and Robert Redford are both major movie stars, but it doesn’t feel that way. They are very subdued in their acting which transforms them into the characters they are portraying. I wasn’t aware that I was watching Robert Redford and Dustin Hoffman; I was watching Carl Bernstein and Bob Woodward do their jobs.

And do their jobs they did. All the President’s Men gets the journalistic process right. The duo (referred to playfully by their editor as Woodstein) don’t just assume that the White House did something wrong. They worked off that assumption to uncover some serious facts. They called people on the phone, they met up with various sources that worked close to the men involved, they went to the Library of Congress to do their own research and they interviewed people who had obviously been scared into keeping quiet. The story could practically write itself. The amount of speculation that could easily be read into the situation must have been tempting. But even when they had enough sources their managing editor sent them out for more: more sources, more evidence and more confrontation. Exposing a conspiracy like this takes a lot of work and Woodstein wasn’t just satisfied with being pretty sure, they needed to be positive that what they knew was the truth.

Although All the President’s Men is about the journalism behind the Watergate scandal, the film leaves out an important conclusion: the aftermath of the story. The film ends with a series of typewriters punching away different dates showing the story continued for years after its discovery. But the audience never gets to see Nixon’s resignation, the ultimate culmination of Woodward and Bernstein’s work. Everyone knows that the resignation is what the film is working towards and not showing it is a huge letdown after all of the buildup.

Aside from that one minor detail, All the President’s Men is a perfect film. It is a history lesson that comes off not as boring, but as one of the most important stories you may ever hear. It should be required viewing for all United States students and it is a shame it took me so long to see it.



4 out of 4 stars

-Christopher O’Connell

The Sweet Smell of Success

Disclaimer: This review is super long because I wrote it for a class.


There is one thing that all men want; one thing that grips the desires of the soul and never lets go. This one thing can sink a man to his lowest depths to achieve it: success. The Sweet Smell of Success shows just how low a man will go and how good a movie about it can be.


The Sweet Smell of Success is the story of New York press agent Sidney Falco (Tony Curtis). Sidney is as crafty as he is charming. He woos potential clients and women alike and at first it seems that he might genuinely care for them. But it soon becomes apparent that Sidney only uses people as stepping stones on his way to the top. If they lose their purpose, they lose their time with Sidney. Sidney isn’t that high on the ladder though, but he knows who is. J.J. Hunsecker (Burt Lancaster) is New York’s most popular columnist and the more he mentions Sidney’s clients, the better off Sidney is. J.J. understands that Sidney needs him and he knows Sidney will do anything to be on his good side. J.J. orders Sidney to break off his sister Susan’s (Susan Harrison) relationship with her musician boyfriend Steve Dallas (Martin Millner). Sidney, blinded by his own ambition and his trust in J.J., is forced to do everything he can to end their engagement.

I have always pictured older films as being very light-hearted affairs. They didn’t deal with hard topics because it was too taboo to show difficult topics on the big screen. The Sweet Smell of Success shattered that naïve assumption. The first time the audience learns that Sidney Falco is nothing but a scumbag is when he uses a trusting girlfriend as a prostitute. The whole film is imbued with the seedier side of show business, one involving blackmail, police brutality and a vaguely incestuous relationship between J.J. and his sister.

The Sweet Smell of Success succeeds because of two important things. Firstly, the two main characters bring their A-game to the table. Tony Curtis is wonderful as Falco. This is considered his first dramatic role and Curtis brings it to life. Falco is cruel and handsome, full of guile while still leading the audience into thinking he is a good guy. Burt Lancaster is the perfect foil for Tony Curtis. Lancaster shows us the creepy dominance of J.J. Hunsecker: a man who seems to be perpetually in the dark. His tall presence controls every scene and he somehow always has a response to every quick comment out of Tony Curtis’ mouth. Burt Lancaster is a fantastic villain, one the audience loves to hate. The Sweet Smell of Success is a testament to his substantial acting ability and he has been recognized as 19th in the Greatest Male Stars of all Time list.

The second thing that helps this movie succeed is its setting. New York feels alive under James Wong Howe’s cinematic direction. The city is a character itself, lending its atmosphere to the mood of the movie. No scene would be as powerful without the city as a backdrop. The score as well is phenomenal. Jazzy riffs play in almost every scene, sounding like the natural noise of the city. Any score that creates atmosphere without drowning the audience is a thing to be praised.

I only have one complaint. Some of the dialogue is a little taut and scripted. Natural flow between actors gets interrupted by lines that only Shakespeare could make up on the spot. For a movie as convincingly wonderful as Success, the very smart dialogue should make it even better, not worse.

In 1957, America was introduced to Hill-Hecht-Lancaster Production’s latest movie The Sweet Smell of Success. Unfortunately, America didn’t appreciate it at first, but saner heads prevailed and Success has enjoyed a resurgence in popularity over the years. It became so popular that it was inducted by the National Film Registry into the Library of Congress. I was surprised by how much I enjoyed the movie and any student of film should put it on their must-watch list. The Sweet Smell of Success is an amazing combination of acting and atmosphere that hasn’t lost a thing over the years.

3 and a 1/2 out of 4 stars
 
-Christopher O'Connell

X-Men: First Class

Another X-Men, what a surprise. Hollywood wants to make some more money off people who are willing to stick around for an old franchise. Most of the time this is a bad thing but with the fifth entry into what everyone thought was a dying series, Marvel has managed to pull off the seldom done. Hold on to your hats folks because we aren't riding economy anymore.

A young Charles Xavier (James McAvoy) discovers an intruder in his house, Raven (or mystique, Jennifer Lawrence). They become fast friends, even though that makes almost no sense in the other films canon. Meanwhile Erik Lehnsherr (Magneto, Michael Fassbender) gets a repeat of the first scene in the first X-Men movie. His mom gets taken away by the Nazis and Erik bends iron gates around like butter. Unbeknownst to audiences of the first movie Sebastian Shaw (Kevin Bacon) was watching. Shaw brings Erik in and gets him to use his powers through anger. It kind of works like the dark side, but who wouldn't go to the dark side after their mom gets shot by Nazis? The audience assumes that Shaw trains Erik to use his powers but somehow they end up separated. Erik makes it his life goal to hunt down Shaw and deliver some metal bending justice. Unfortunately, Shaw has mutant powers of his own, the ability to absorb and reuse energy.

The movie really should just be titled Magneto, because Michael Fassbender steals the show. There's more to it obviously, Charles eventually catches up to Magneto and together with the CIA they find a couple young mutants to help them fight Shaw. The entire movie culminates in a showdown between Shaw and the X-Men at a re-imagined version of the Cuban Missile Crisis. One in which the X-Men save the day.

Let's start off by saying that First Class was a pleasant surprise. I was certain it was going to be bad. I didn't count on James McAvoy and Michael Fassbender. McAvoy takes on his role with gusto, giving us a glimpse into a young Professor X, one who uses his considerable knowledge to hit on women at bars. Unlike Patrick Stewart, McAvoy has a full head of hair, "Are you sure we can't shave your head? Don't touch my hair," but he adopts the role very well. Fassbender is brilliant. His anger and hatred seethes through his performance and his mission is one of vengeance; only slightly halted by his budding bromance with Charles. The dynamic between the two friends/allies in the original series was intriguing to say the least. X-Men: First Class expands upon it like a college thesis and adds so many more dimensions that makes the two an incredible case study. The way Charles's handicap ties in is so emotionally charged I was almost prepared to pay for another ticket and see it again.

The special effects are top notch (as they should be) and the violence gets brutal. Magneto takes no prisoners and it is fantastic. There were so many wow moments that just made me love this movie even more. But it wasn't too dark, somehow it was still a light film with some funny lines.

The only detraction from the film are the young actors trying to fill the shoes of the older X-Men in previous films. Once Frasier plays the Beast you can't really have anyone else do it. When the kids were the focus of the story, it turned into a mutant breakfast club. Pass, give me some more action. And Rose Byrne as the sympathetic CIA agent was terrible. She left a bad taste in my mouth.

First Class isn't as good as the second X-Men. It is way better than the third and it may be on par or better than the first. A great re-entry into the franchise after the disappointing Wolverine film. A great way to start off this superhero packed summer and watch for Michael Fassbender in the million roles he is now going to be offered. First Class gets an extra half star because it surprised me so much.

3 and a 1/2 out of 4 stars

-Christopher O'Connell

P.S. Wolverine has a great cameo that had the audience clapping. I wish I could ruin it.

Network: A Quick Review

First off "Network" is one my favorite films of all time.  It had an incredible cast including Faye Dunaway, William Holden, Peter Finch, and Robert Duvall.  It was directed by the incredibly talented Sidney Lumet, who also did another of my favorite films, 12 Angry Men.  The story revolves around the UBS television station.  The network has had low ratings and the crew will literally do whatever it takes to get more viewers, no matter how insane, immoral, and illegal the proposed solutions may be.  I won't go into this aspect anymore, in case people want to see the film, and I highly recommend that they do.  This film was a satire of the television industry and the ridiculous extremes that people go to to get ratings.  Over 30 years later and all of a sudden what happens in Network doesn't seem so farfetched.  Obviously, this film took it to the extreme.  However, taking a look at the news now, and how they often look for the most extreme, violent, or sexual story to get people's attention it becomes disconcerting, frightening, annoying, pick your favorite adjective.  Network also is incredibly character driven and it is one of the key reasons why it is so wonderful to watch.  Dunaway definitely earned her Oscar as Diana Christensen who is completely consumed by the false world of television, causing her not to have a firm grasp on reality.  This leads to a doomed affair with Max Schumacher (Holden) as well as her going mildly insane, along with Howard Beale (Finch), and others as they try to garner more ratings.  Finally this film won three acting Oscars, and one for its screenplay, but was nominated for many more and it is considered one of the best films of all time, according to the American Film Institute...in case that is a deciding factor for people wanting to check it out.  I'm really going to have to see it more times, twice just isn't enough.  Such a great story, although depressing and extremely serious, phenomenal actors, directing, cinematography, and everything else add up to a enjoyable, well paced 2 hours of film.

4 stars out of 4...and one last thing this film has one of the most famous lines in film history: "I'm as mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore." Yes, that line really is as wonderful as you all dreamed it would be.

-Joseph Sbrilli


Alternate Review:

I watched Network pretty recently as well. The movie won a bunch of Oscars and awards and everything like that. All the critics say it is a landmark film. I say that it has not aged well at all. The movie has some great ideas and themes that are fairly evident from the get go. Those are wonderful but the movie just feels old. All the characters break the most important rule of storytelling, show don't tell. Network does a lot of telling, in massive monologues that would make Shakespeare pass out. And Faye Dunaway makes me want to barf. I've seen squirrels act better for some trail mix. Don't tell me she deserved that Oscar she was awful and she looks like a female William Dafoe. It was like watching Sarah Jessica Parker only in the 70's. That should make a lot of people stay away from this one.

Little Fockers

In case we forgot what a funny last name Focker is, Little Fockers makes about 32 references to it.  Unfortunately, that joke, along with many others were used so many times that one might actually scream watching this unnecessary second Meet The Parents sequel.  I'm almost certain that every joke and sight gag was either used directly, or was alluded to in the previous installments.  On top of that what a tremendous waste of some of the most talented actors in the business (don't anyone for one moment think I am referring to Owen Wilson and Jessica Alba because they were awful, and will be dealt with later).

Yes,  believe it or not this movie includes three Oscar winners (Robert De Niro, Dustin Hoffman, and Barbra Streisand)  First of all, Dustin Hoffman was not going to be in this at first, but the producers knew their movie was awful and essentially bribed Hoffman into returning in his funny role as Bernie Focker.  The problem is that his scenes seem extremely random, as they were added after filming had completed.  Also, his part was far too short!  He was one of the main reasons why I enjoyed Meet the Fockers so much.  Barbra Streisand for the most part also is not utilized much, although I will admit her two segments of "The Roz Focker Show" were actually pretty funny.  And poor Robert De Niro.  He is so talented and actually funny, and yet I swear he could have ad-libbed better dialogue, while being heavily sedated.

Another problem I have with this is the unfunny, sexual jokes, often times said by children.  What were they thinking!?! That is weird and uncomfortable and I would not want my kid to memorize some of these lines.  Another thing, why in the world would you have a Viagra type drug and its effects on Robert De Niro be like a 10 minute scene in the movie.  It is frightening and may either cause you to gag or have severe nightmares.

Finally, Owen Wilson is awful and not funny in the least.  He infuriates me sometimes, especially since he had so much screen time.  And Jessica Alba may even be worse, because she is an absolutely terrible actress, one of the worst I have ever seen.  It's like she is reading off of cue cards and putting weird, cheesy inflections into everything she says, so that she is positive the audience knows she is attempting to make a joke.  And her looks are completely cancelled out by her attempts to act as far as I am concerned.

Also, Laura Dern and Harvey Keitel were randomly added (more star power?) and also wasted.  It's like the movie makers cannot handle so much celebrity in one movie.  Basically, this movie was predictable, unnecessary, a complete waste of talent, annoying, tedious, random, predictable...basically exactly what the majority of the human race was expecting about 7 seconds into the trailer.   If you are thinking about seeing this movie...shame on you!...unless it's free...or if you like some of the actors and want to wish you were watching them in something better.

All they really needed to do was fire Jessica Alba and Owen Wilson and reprimand them and give Dustin Hoffman and Barbra Streisand more screen time! Those two things would have at least upped the enjoyment a little bit.  Yes, this review was very ranty, but I was in the mood to be really harsh with a movie, and my goodness this was just too perfect to pass up (9% on Rotten Tomatoes!).  I can only assume in 4-6 years there will be another movie with the word Focker somewhere in the title.

Oh and in case anyone cares the main plot is Jack (De Niro) wants Greg (Ben Stiller) to be the one to carry on the family name or something, but naturally Jack still doesn't trust his son-in-law and thinks he's having an affair.  At this point I'm just worn out.

1/2 star out of 4...oh yes...I would watch this 5 more times before I even consider watching the credits of Year One again.


-Joseph Sbrilli